To Love

To my love,

I love the way you look at me. Your eyes talk to me about love and about us. Your eyes are brimming with stories - stories about our beautiful tomorrows that await me.

Your eyes exude warmth and promises. The warmth it showers weaves a cocoon of your love around me. It makes me feel at home. It makes me want to stay in this warm cocoon forever.

I can see love in your eyes. I can also feel how hard they are trying to assure me of your love. It feels as if your eyes are mouthing ‘I really love you, Believe me please’. The effort is so palpable. Time and again, I have wished that for once, they would not mouth what they invariably would. It makes me want to look away. It makes me want to look within.

Every time I look into your eyes, I question myself. It makes me question my presence. I wonder if I really deserve so much love. It makes me feel unworthy. It makes me feel unjust, unable to reciprocate the love and warmth that you shower on me. It makes me realize that I am falling short. Your eyes not only mouth your assurances but also mirror my insecurities. It shows me my reflection which makes me cringe. I badly want to give you what you duly deserve, nothing less. I want to give all of myself.

I want to love you. I want to cherish you. But I am unable to. The fear of losing control over my emotions makes it hard. I am afraid to become vulnerable. I am afraid to experience the emotions which I never thought I was capable of. I am scared to lower my guards.

I want to take a step ahead and dig my face into your sweaty chest. I want to leave behind my inhibitions and love you with all I have. I want to bear my soul to you.

I want to be able to love you like you do.

While I begin my journey from me to you, wish me luck!

-         

      Yours Always